Evil Dead


Tonight, I witnessed.. Evil Dead.

Five twenty-something friends become holed up in a remote cabin. When they discover a Book of the Dead, they unwittingly summon up dormant demons living in the nearby woods, which possess the youngsters in succession until only one is left intact to fight for survival. ~IMDB

I’ve been very vocal about my displeasure with the recent onslaught of Reboots and Remakes.. especially movies that were good, in their original release. This one was surprisingly good! err.. EVIL.. More of a reboot, than a remake. The 2013 version of “Evil Dead” takes a more modern twist on the classic story, losing the comedy (let’s face it.. the original Evil Dead was a dark comedy), and bringing new blood and gorey horror to the franchise. Oh.. and I mean GORE – this is a bloody, violent, evil movie that does the original proud. This is NOT for children.

Hey, don’t worry, I’m not going all ‘fan boy’ on  you here.. it had it’s flaws. but, it could have been MUCH worse, and I was actually expecting MUCH worse.

For true fans of horror, I would definitely recommend seeing this one. Oh, and BTW – stick around for the end of the credits.

Spoiler Alert!

I’m warning you.. this movie isn’t for the squeamish. Here’s a list of what I can remember.. if you can’t handle it. Dont watch. As with the original film – the victims are mostly female. This is done on purpose, to offend your sensibilities and infuriate you.. after all, a woman should be cherished, not cut in half with a chainsaw..

  • Cats killed and hung in basement
  • Young woman (possessed) burned alive
  • Dogs head bashed in with hammer (implied, not shown)
  • Tree Rape (yes, the Tree Rape scene is back)
  • Boiling water shower (skin blisters and peels)
  • Girl (possessed) licks box cutter, splits tongue
  • Girl slices off most of her own face
  • Guy gets stabbed in the face, repeatedly, with a hypodermic needle
  • Girls Head bashed in with toilet lid
  • Shot gun killing (multiple)
  • Girl cuts her own (demon infected) arm off with electric carving knife
  • Nail Gun (no deaths, but looks rather painful)
  • Crow bar attack (broken limbs)
  • Chainsaw amputation
  • Girl tears her own hand off to get free of a car, that’s rolled on her arm (she then attaches a chainsaw to her stump, does this sound familiar?)
  • Chainsaw bisection (of the demon, so she totally deserves it)

And now.. some of the groaners.. not jokes, just stuff that doesnt make sense.

  • One of the characters explains that a girl was legally dead, and they had to “Use a defibrillator” to bring her back. This is a common Hollywood mistake. A defibrillator only works if the heart is still beating – and is used to help restore a normal rhythm to a mis-firing heartbeat… or.. an “abnormal fibrillation” aka “a-fib” (hence the term “de-fibrillator”)
  • They’re in a cabin in the middle of nowhere, and there’s not a generator in sight. Where’d the electricity come from?
  • You can’t MAKE a defibrillator out of a battery, wires and two needles
Author: Jethal